The Three Book Curse

  

          This week’s blog may seem a little bit far-fetched but I need you to hear me out. I’ve made a discovery that I believe may prove the existence of dark voodoo magic in the book world. Maybe. It’s just a theory, and feel free to yell at me down in the comments section but it would be morally wrong not to let you in on such a major scientific revelation.

     

       So here it is: I believe that the third book in every dystopian series is cursed. I really do think that there is some kind of mystical nonsense going on here because no matter how untouchable an author may seem, as soon as they release that long-anticipated third and final novel, the entire series seems to just crumble into the dirt.

   

         Okay, so maybe that’s a little harsh. But seriously, I haven’t in a very long time read the third book in a trilogy and thought: ‘Yes, that was brilliant. That met all of my expectations and more!’ Every time I get my eager trembling hands on that final book the same thing happens: I buy it, so ridiculously enthusiastic to embark on what I am sure will be the most glorious, eye-opening, heart-stopping adventure I have ever been on and by the time I’m finished all I can think is… Meh.

  

          But, this wouldn’t be science without a little evidence now would it? Well, sadly I can provide you with quite a lot. The best example I have of this would be Suzanne Collins’ ‘Hunger Games: Mockingjay . The series had so much promise. Everyone was talking about it! When the second book came out the whole world was setting itself alight with ‘Catching Fire’ excitement. Walk into any high-school during the hunger games craze and I can guarantee you would see at least five three-finger salutes, seven Katniss braids and two furious battles over who was best: Finnick, Gale or Peeta? But sadly, after everyone had finally blazed their way through the third and final book there was an overwhelming sense of disappointment.

  

          The book wasn’t bad by any means but, let’s face it, it wasn’t great. It wasn’t the shining golden trophy of a book that everyone had been waiting for, more a 3^rd place bronze medal. Bronze is okay, it’s still winning, but it isn’t exactly… desirable. At first everyone was shell-shocked. How could this possibly be? We began to grieve. Pretending it hadn’t happened. Denying with all our might that the book might be anything less than wonderful, amazing, golden. But, now that some time has passed, I think we can accept it – it really wasn’t very good.

   

         Why though? Why wasn’t it very good? Lauren Oliver’s ‘Requiem’, Veronica Roth’s ‘Allegiant’, Scott Westerfield’s ‘Specials’, Malorie Blackman’s ‘Checkmate’,  Ally Condie’s ‘Reached’…   The list goes on. How is it that so many promising series’ could plunge so horrifically into mediocrity?

  

          Maybe there is too much pressure on the writer to finish well? Once you’ve written two of the most astounding books you’ve ever written it must be very difficult to muster the same incredible amount of writing-brilliance from inside to do it for a third and final time. How in the world do you come up with an ending that will do the series any justice? Everyone’s watching and waiting for you to write a book so good that it could compete with the bible in greatness. How the hell do you do it? You don’t. Maybe it’s impossible.

           But as I professor in the science of reading I have done my research and I know that this just doesn’t prove true. No, the blame for this book-based tragedy should not be placed on the writer but, in fact, on us, the reader. It is our fault. We just get too darn excited!

  

          We can’t help ourselves, especially with the dystopian genre! It’s new and modern with juicy plotlines and gorgeous love-interests. When books are this good, how can we help ourselves? Besides, it’s fun to get all hyped up! Dystopian fiction seems to be able to create a buzz like no other genre. Entire communities are formed in appreciation for the series’, stocked with enough fanart to put London’s National Gallery to shame.

   

         But we get so carried away with all our excitement that we accidentally give the series impossible, unreachable expectations. Two great books is enough to pull down the galaxy and put stars in our eyes. If the first and second books were that good then the third book has to be even better! The third book will be the book to end all books! Right?

    

        Wrong. It’s our greatest downfall. We fall in love with a series so deeply and passionately that we inadvertently destroy anything that could possibly come next. We crown writers as royalty when really all they are is just a few normal chaps and chapettes who quite like writing stories.

           We are the voodoo doctors who inflicted such a terrible, terrible curse. And we are the only ones who can fix things. We have to stop ruining things for ourselves. I’m not saying don’t get so excited, I’m just saying, put it in perspective.  Realise that what you want may not be the same as what the writer imagines and try and accept that. And if it really is awful that doesn’t have to be the end - Re-write for yourself! Fanficiton is the ultimate way to both get excited over a series and get exactly what you want out of it! It’s fun too!

  

          And with that, I close my scientific case. The research has been done, the experiment carried out and the evaluation written. It’s time to take my lab-coat off and put up my feet. But next time you start a new dystopian series be careful. Only you can save us from the terrible, frightening, Three Book Curse.

            

            

Reader Problems Tag

Hello, my little addicts (Oh my, that is so your nickname now!), this is Evie coming back at you with another Tag post! Today I have had the honor of being tagged to do the Reading Problems Tag by Izzy over at The Reading Izzy! That girl is seriously great so go on and take a moment to hop on over to her blog? This tag was created by another awesome blogging buddy named Jay from over at Books ByJay! (She’s nice too, I swear!)

So, let’s quit yacking and get right down to it!

    1.   You have 20,000 books on your TBR. How in the world do you decide what to read next?

I am a horrific mood reader, me! If I am just not in the mood to read something then I simply can’t. My heart has to be in it, you know? How could I possibly read crime when I crave the sweet romantic pages of Anna and the French Kiss (I'm always in the mood for Anna...)? Read some sickly sweet and fluffy when all I want to do is strike a dramatic life-affirming pose and read a good feminist biography, huh? You see my point.

    2.   You’re halfway through a book and you’re just not loving it. Do you quit or are you committed?

Oh, my. All the secrets are coming out now, aren’t they? Sadly I’m a quitter. Quitters never win, winners never quit… But at least quitters don’t find out that Dumbledore dies, right? (I can say that little spoiler because it’s just about the worst kept secret ever.

    3.   The end of the year is coming and you’re so close, but so far away on your Goodreads reading challenge. Do you try to catch up and how?

Well actually, this is the first year I’ve ever attempted the goodreads challenge (why not check out my goodreads here?), but if I’m having a bit of a slump, not reading as fast as I’d like, well I like to take a trip to the local bookshop. Just the site of all those fresh-smelling paperbacks is enough to send me spiraling into a reading frenzy. TBR? What TBR?!

    4.   The covers of a series you love do not match. How do you cope?

I cope just fine thank you very much! I think a little bit of mix and match gives a bookshelf character, you know? Livens things up a bit! Why go red, red, red, when you can go red, green, blue, indigo, NEON YELLOW, black, white, rainbow, shartruce?! Besides, you should never judge a book by it’s cover! (She says a little guiltily…)

   

    5.   Everyone and their mother loves a book you really don’t like. Who do you bond with over shared feelings?

Well, I’d love to talk to you guys about it but I’m always so scared to write a bad review… But trust me, I may seem all nicey-nicey online but just see me in my Modern Studies class when someone starts talking about Sarah Manning or Carol Ann Duffy! I’m a wolf.

    6.   You’re reading a book and you’re about to start crying in public. How do you deal?

This actually happened to me in a reading lesson at school a few years ago when I was reading ‘Marley and Me’ for the first time. I think if you hold back the tears it kind of tampers with your overall experience of the book so I just bent my head and covered the 300^th page onwards with fresh salty tears! But luckily, with a book like that, all that I needed to say for the rest of the day when people questioned the puffy eyed look I was rockin’ was a simple, emotional ‘Marley’. They understood.

7. A sequel of a book you loved just came out, but you’ve forgotten a lot from the prior novel. Will you re-read the book? Skip the sequel? Try to find a synopsis on Goodreads? Cry in frustration?!?!?!?

Oh man, cry in frustration. I am such a simpleton. I STILL haven’t read Allegiant just because I can’t be bothered to spend a couple days going back over Divergent and Insurgent! It’s like, I’m dying to read it, but I’m also super lazy, but also I can’t remember whether Tris is Dauntless or Amity?! My brain goes into overdrive and deletes the very idea of the book I was wanting to read in order to avoid the prospects of a complete Evie meltdown!

    8.   You do not want anyone—ANYONE—borrowing your books. How do you politely tell people nope when they ask?

Well actually, I’m usually the one forcing books into other people’s hands! If I love a book then I absolutely need other people to love it to, otherwise I’ll have almost no release (well, apart from you lovely lot of course) for all my bookish emotions, and trust me - I usually have quite a lot of emotions. But every now and then there is that one person who will keep my book for years or bring it back like they used it to wipe the kitchen table, and in that case all you have to do is pull on your innocent eyes and tell them sweetly that you’ve already lent that book to your mum/auntie/sister/cousin/dog and so you couldn’t possibly give it to them for another 99 years… sorry! Problem solved.

    9.   Reading ADD. You’ve picked up and put down 5 books in the last month. How do you get over your reading slump?

I’ve actually done all my scientific research on the reading slump already and have published my ground-breaking findings in a post right here: How to Cure the Reading Slump! So, if you really want to know, and you know how to open a new tab you can just go read that! Go on, I’ll wait here.

    

   10.  There are so many new books coming out that you’re dying to read! How many do you actually buy?

Well, being sixteen, I’m poorer that bloomin’ Oliver Twist, so probably not as many as I’d like! Occasionally I beg my family to spend a few quid on poor old me, like the little begging cretin I am, but mostly I just harbor all the teeny tiny pennies in my purse until I can afford one or two all on my own!

Rich little blighters. 

   11.  After you’ve bought the new books you can’t wait to get to, how long do they sit on your shelf before you get to them?

I finish whatever I’m reading and then GO, GO, GO! I don’t see any point in waiting until my excitement has died a slow and painful death to read a book! All the fun is the buy-and-read-immediately buzz!

And that, my little addicts, (see, I told you I was gonna use it!) was the Reader Problems Tag! It was such lovely fun, but what would make it even more fun if we could have a wee chat about some of your answers to these questions down in the comments section. It’s comfy and warm down there, you’ll like it!

But before we do so, I would like to tag a few of the best blogging pioneers in the business (bar Izzy and Jay of course!)

Morrighan Rose from Elysian Fields Book Reviews

My girl Tika from Fangirl Confessions

Yvonne from A World Between Folded Pages

Ellen from Quest Reviews

Maz from Two Handed Library

And finally, Emily from Forever Literary

Thank you very much addicts! ( the third time makes it a definite thing )

How to Cure the Reading Slump

The reading slump: a disease, exclusive to readers only, in which one cannot get their face stuck into any books for a stupidly long period of time. Symptoms of the reading slump include loss of interest, total boredom and an overwhelming desire to hit one’s self in the face with a large hardback from the cookery section.

        Yes folks, the reading slump, it happens to the best of us and it happens to the worst. It’s hideous, entirely unavoidable and up until now, thought to be incurable, but I’m here to make all of that change! Use my newly discovered method and you’ll be out of bed with your hardback-harry-potter bruises fading away in no time. So, let’s put our lab-coats on, grab our stethoscopes and get right down to the bottom of this horrific illness. Doctor Evie - reporting for duty.

  

       Firstly, why does the reading slump even happen? The disease seems so random and spiteful that even the most wiggly bookworms (I mean the kind of people who can flip between Charles Dickens and Diary Of a Wimpy Kid without even a couple minutes break to make a cup of tea) could easily be infected. You can wash your hands all you like, but there seems to be nothing stopping you from being poisoned as well. Or is there?

Well, if my research proves true, the slump is most likely to thrive in those who place too much pressure on themselves. Don’t force yourself to read! In fact, that’s probably one of the worst things you can do. There’s nothing worse than pressing yourself to crawl through a long, monotonous book just because you think you have to! Who cares if Johnny, Greg and Tabitha have all read ‘The Great Gatsby’ and you haven’t? Who cares if you don’t know what the hell an ‘Avox’ even is? Who cares?!

This substance may be of detriment
to your health. 

 Read because you want to, not because you feel you have to and I promise the slump won’t be hiding round your bookshelves any time soon. This, I think, is why the slump always hits me hardest when I’m trying to get through a novel for English class. Sadly, English class reading cannot be helped and this is when we need the cure! Cue Evie's medical science! 

        So, here you are. You’re sitting on the couch with your old battered school copy of ‘To Kill a Mocking Bird’ for the sixth time that week; you’ve just read the same sentence about sixteen times over when you decide you’ve had enough. You go to find a different book from your bedroom, but you’re not really sure what you’re looking for. You must have started and gave up on five different books before you realise… you’ve got it. The slump has hit, you are infected.

   

I prescribe one dose of Vampire
Fiction. To be taken twice
daily. 

      Sadly in this case, my first curing method– to read something different that you actually want to read - has not worked. Sometimes a simple change of pace can get you speeding along again but not this time. We will be using method number two – re-reading. Though a book may not be so riveting the second time around, re-reading still provides a comfortable experience with book you know for a fact that you like. It doesn’t take too much effort and attention and because you’re certain to enjoy it your reading enthusiasm will be boosted enough to take on any library.

  

       With a sigh, you pick up your old blue copy of ‘The Fault In Our Stars’ and settle back down for a long-haul read. But, to your horror, not even Augustus Waters can perk you up anymore. This calls for some drastic action!

  

       Method number 3: The bookshop. Immersing yourself in a place so thick with scent of stories and characters can be enough to make your page-turning hand start to itch. The bookshop is magical. I don’t know about you but I always get excited buying a new book, in fact, I get so psyched that I always have to start my new book as soon as I get home. You buy something new, trying your best to get buzzed over your purchase, and nervously make your way home. Surely this will get you nose back between the pages of a book?

 

Quarantine Zone. 

        Nope. It hasn’t worked. You’re back on the couch, ready to burn your bookshelf to the ground. I have only one more method left. It is the simplest, most effective, yet probably the most ignored method that there is:

   

      Just stop. Let it go. Put the book down and walk away. It may take a day, a week, or even only an hour but I promise you that eventually you’ll regain your appetite for words and paper and stories once again.  You need to make reading fun again for yourself and this is never going to happen when you’re trying to make yourself read when, obviously, you don’t really want to.

  

       Uncommonly known fact about the slump: It can smell fear. So, the longer you fret and worry over the slump’s horrific symptoms, the longer the slump will trap you in its vice-like grip. Forget about it, stop worrying. It’s inconvenient and annoying, yes, but it isn’t the end of the world – you’ll survive. Soon enough you’ll get your hands on something so good that it’ll be all you can do not to swallow it up in one day or less. Because the best cure for the read slump, is really very simple – time.

   

      And with that I conclude my scientific research. May all those suffering from the illness be benefited and healed by my discovery. Doctor Evie is over and out.